This will be a (semi)live blog starting with my run tonight(Thursday).
[sidenote:I was at work before 8:30am this morning and left at 8:40pm]
I do this because I have too a few weeks out of the year, it’s part of my job, but also because I have the compulsive need to make sure I am doing everything I can to be the best I can at everything I’m doing–I have obsessive tendencies and I can let them get the best of me sometimes but that is another topic for another day
It is 9:53pm. I’m getting ready to go run. I don’t want to run right now but I do want to run right now. I am tired but I am not tired. This is not the latest I’ve ever run but it’s the latest I’ve run lately. Summer is over but the summer focus is still lingering.
I have a dream and a goal and as silly and unrealistic as it may seem, maybe even unattainable, I still can’t let go of the notion that one day I’ll get faster. Notably faster–fast enough to finally convince myself I have accomplished something. I guess this is why I’m running now after working and being on my feet for 12 hours. I’m determined to succeed.
9:58pm put on my red Sparkly Soul headband
10pm. Putting on my shoes.
10:03pm. Leaving. No Garmin tonight. Sometimes pace isn’t necessarily important.
Between the time I started running and the time I stopped–thought about Gatorade–thought about the people I could see relaxing inside their houses–thought about how I am chasing dreams and they are watching tv–thought about how quiet and peaceful the town was tonight–concluded I would run 8 miles instead of 7 because the extra mile never hurts–thought about how I need to break in my new xc spikes I bought for $8 after Christmas–thought about how much I love the new gear they gave me at the coaches meeting last night–thought about how happy I was that I made myself run tonight–thought about how badly I want to snuggle up with my cats–thought about tomorrow’s workout–ran by the lighthouse 2x–wondered why there is a lighthouse in this person’s backyard–thought about how free I felt–thought about my goals–ran home.
11:04pm stopped running.
11:10pm drank a blue frost Gatorade and pet my cats
Shower–brushed my teeth–did core–stretched some–took vitamins
It was worth it to spend my night running and doing everything that accompanies it. I don’t care if I have to sacrifice socialization, fun, even free time if it means I’ll succeed one day. I’ll do anything I can to make sure I don’t slip up with my training. This is my number one priority right now. This is me being obsessive again.
12:27am went to bed
Ignored the alarm several times
7:23am. Got out of bed because a kitten was meowing in my ear.
7:30am ate breakfast
7:45am got ready for work
7:50am gathered my running cloths for tonight’s tempo run
8:24am made coffee
Tweeted a picture of me wearing a sparkly soul headband while making coffee
8:27am left for work
8:42am walked into work
Became increasingly irritated as soon as I got to work–tried to make light of the stress that my job is currently causing me by smiling and joking around–got more stressed out because people can sometimes just be disrespectful–tried to calm down and make light of this by smiling and joking around–answered the phone a bajillion times–drank half of my cold coffee–solved problems–printer jammed–printer ran out of toner–printer ran out of paper–paychecks were messed up–called hr–got mad at hr–explained to the employees why the paychecks were messed up–felt my blood pressure going up–drank more cold coffee–tried to smile and make light of the fact my coffee was cold–I drank the coffee–lost the coffee–found the coffee again–decided the coffee didn’t taste good anymore
1:25pm decided to eat lunch because I was starving and I needed to decompress
All I want to do is get this tempo run over with. I am loosing my patience. I don’t like to feel so overwhelmed all day. I am going to suck it up and get to the end of the day. I have to work in order to survive. I need to work to buy shoes. Working let’s me run. Working is helping my training then….I’ve decided that’s logical right now. I’m tired.
4:47pm sent a text to my teammates. Said I was going to leave work. Sat in my car for a while before I actually left and tried to convince myself that it would be a good tempo run.
I have no down time but that’s okay because I won’t have to tempo alone. That’s makes it worth it but I feel a little irritated that I can’t actually relax for a while. If I get there hassle free maybe I can stretch out.
4:53 left the parking lot. Got stuck in traffic. Got frustrated. I hate traffic.
5:35 finally got to cooper river park and got changed in the car/parking lot. I didn’t wear spandex under my work cloths today–big mistake. I can’t believe the traffic I just drove though I’m going to run like crap today–no I’m not–I’m going to do the best I can with the situation I’m in.
Put on the red Sparkly Soul again.
Ran 8.25 miles. 30 minutes at tempo and covered 4.75 miles (6:20 pace)
While running I thought about how much I wanted to have a good workout so I just kept going hard the whole tempo and disregarding my watch.
8:16pm finally made it home after getting a bit lost and stuck in more traffic. Any road work can ruin my whole drive. I’m terrible at directions.
I wouldn’t have had such a good run without my teammates so it was worth it.
8:39 getting an Epsom salt bath
10:00pm I can barely keep my eyes open but I’m still so happy because the tempo run went well.
10:05pm reviewing information so I can register for my grad classes tomorrow!
11:00pm core and stretching
Don’t remember falling asleep
7:40am woke up with an actual pain in my butt
Stretched some–sat on a heating pad–limped around the house–wished I could go back to bed–blamed this on rushing to the tempo run–realized it’s not from that–it’s probably from not stretching well after the tempo run–should have foam rolled
Ate breakfast, got ready for work. Didn’t make coffee today.
8:30am Phil drove me to work
8:46am Arrived at work.
Did work–answered the phone–told a lady on the phone my life goal was to make her happy and handle her problem–I’m sure she believed me–I wasn’t being sincere but if making her happy was part of doing my job properly I wasn’t exactly lying–bought some coffee–did more work–drank the coffee–my butt still hurts
I just want a day off from everything. Working hard pays off right? If I work hard I’ll be rewarded. Okay, I’ll stick with that theory.
3:56pm left work
Came home–snuggled with junior–snuggled with ninja
Fell asleep on the couch.
Tried to get the pain out of my butt.
8:30ish ran–the pain in my butt goes away when I run–I got a stomach ache so bad I had to stop after 4.5 miles
A bad run is better than no run at all
9:20ish updated the google doc for GSTC fall races–attempted to register for classes–got a shower–just sent my advisor an email because registering for these classes is overwhelming me–hopefully he doesn’t think I’m crazy–plugged in my Garmin–planked for 3 minutes–side planked for 1 minute on each side–did some other core–push-ups–stretched
I can’t let these small priorities slip through the cracks. Every small effort makes a big difference. Small sacrifices=big dreams
12:55am went to bed. Junior climbed into my arms. Long run in the morning
6:56am woke up
Overslept but hurried to get ready for the long run.
7:37am left for the long run. Drove to Princeton in pain the whole way.
Around 8:35am began running
Still had a pain in my butt
Some of us ran 3 miles ahead of time and then met the rest of the team for the last 15 giving a few of us, myself included, 18 miles for the day. I felt decent except for the mile we ran up a hill and I also had some issues with just feeling fatigued miles 13-16 but then I felt awesome the last 2 miles. The pain in my butt is going away.
Ended with 56.25 miles for the week without actually trying to do that. That 18 mile run tied my longest run of 18 miles 2 summers ago when I got lost while running because of road work. Today’s run was much faster and with amazing teammates and friends. A long week ended on a good note.
I feel like I can do absolutely anything right now. I feel unstoppable. I feel so strong and determined. That is why I am doing this.
One thought on “Why am I doing this????– A (Semi)live blog”
Wow Angela,,,,,,! Good work ethics love you